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Photo Compliments Addison Cumberbatch
Planning a wedding can be super stressful. In fact, planning a wedding in 2020 /2021 is even more stressful than normal. Feeling anxious or stressed is a normal part of life, but if your anxiety has become debilitating in any way, or you're experiencing panic attacks, then you should definitely seek professional help. Our guide today is a realistic list of coping mechanisms, tools and tips to see you through the planning process, whatever level of anxiety you experience. While, we can't take all he stress away, we can certainly help you to manage it. Here's our top picks for how to deal with all the stress and anxiety.
1. Be Decisive
Photo Compliments Life Photography by Aniya
I'd say this to any couple, being decisive in wedding planning is even more important if you have anxiety. Of course you should always compare options and make considered decisions, but when it comes to things like invitation wording, table plans, or menu choices, you can be stuck for weeks going round in circles and getting more stressed in the process. Set weekly decision making deadlines, make a call, and move on to the next job on your list!
2. Anticipate Your Anxiety
Photo Compliments Gina Francesca Photography
I know this sounds crazy and may be a little hard to swallow, but anticipating moments that may cause you to be anxious, and skipping them entirely will especially help if you are prone to panic attacks. On my wedding day, I knew when I got dressed I only wanted my girls and a select few to be there. For some it could be making a speech or even your first dance that bring on these feelings. Do your best to ditch these feelings and do your best.
3. Set a Wide Contingency Plan
Photo Compliment Life Photography by Aniya
The biggest source of stress for couples getting married is the budget. Prevent money worries by setting a hefty contingency - at least 15% - over what you expected to spend. Be realistic, and don't plan a wedding you cannot afford.
4. Comparison is the Thief of Joy
Photo Compliment Ricky Chase Photography
Don't compare your wedding to anyone else's. And if Aunt Gwen wants to tell you about the amazing canapes at cousin's Kelly's wedding, tune her out and change the subject!
5. Take a Time Away from Planning
Self care is super trendy right now and so important. Take time for you. Whether it's date nights, long hot baths, exercising, massages - take a break. No emails, no field questions, switch off the voice in your head.
6. Pretend You're Getting Married a Month Early
Photo Compliments Cossmic Cinematography Barbados
Even I'm prone to feeling overwhelmed, this was another trick that really helped me and my husband keep on top of our planning. We planned our wedding as if we were getting married a month before our wedding day. That meant even the final details like the ceremony booklets, the table plan, the candle run, and the bathroom basket, were all done way in advance. It meant we could spend the last few weeks having fun, soaking it all in...
7. Spell Things Out for your Guests
Photo Compliments Ricky Chase Photography
Guests asking lots of questions can get super annoying for all couples getting married, and it can easily escalate into a cause of anxiety. Of course you're happy to chat about your big day, but when it's week before your wedding and you're being asked about group rates on accommodation, what time the ceremony starts, and if children are *really* not invited, it can be overwhelming. It won't totally solve things, but arming your guests with as much clarity and information as possible will definitely help. I found having a wedding website in particular to be invaluable for putting all the FAQs in one place, and directing any questions towards it.
8. You Are Beautiful and You're Marrying a Hottie!
Photo Compliments Gina Francesca Photography
Another big source of anxiety for both brides and grooms is how they'll look on their wedding day. We're all for indulging in some pampering and doing what we need to feel our best (double-up those fake lashes please!), but please know that you don't need to worry about your body, your skin or your hair. We've yet to see a couple who didn't look like a million bucks walking up the aisle. There's just something about that loved-up wedding day glow that makes everyone look like a massive hottie!
9. Leave the Drama Behind
Photo Compliment Life Photography by Aniya
Hmmmm. Where to start. Your bridesmaids can't agree on what to do for the hen. Your uncle is refusing to come to the wedding unless he can make a speech. You're mother-in-law is not getting on board with the items in the ceremony. This is going to be a tough one, but try not to get caught up in other people's "stuff". Yes you want to be considerate, which you should be, and in some instances you can take suggestions and accommodate certain needs, but you will be married and everyone will suck it up. To save you a lot of stress in the mean time just step back and let individuals deal with their own issues on their own time.
10. Decide to Enjoy It
Photo Compliments Komac Photography
This might seem silly, but sometimes as a bride or groom, you feel like you're supposed to be anxious about your wedding, or like you're not doing it right if you're not stressed. Sometimes you need to actively decide to relish the planning, enjoy the butterflies, and bask in the unpredictability. Your wedding day, and the lead up to it, will be all the better for it!
11. It Takes Two to Plan a Wedding
Photo Compliments Leslie St. John Photography
A lot of pre-wedding anxiety comes from one person feeling like the weight of the wedding planning is on them. The endless to-do list, the emails with suppliers, fielding questions and opinions, it's pretty exhausting. Make sure you and your other half play an equal role in planning and decision making. Don't just delegate tasks to them like a manager (that's just another job on you!), make the list together and split the jobs so you're equally invested from the start. If you don't have time to plan together, hirea great wedding planner in Barbados. Our wedding planners are professional, and friendly and will even save you from a great deal of stress and anxiety (it might cost less than you think!).
12. The Entire Process is and Experience.
Photo Compliments Life Photography by Aniya
Wedding planning is supposed to be fun and exciting. Yes, there are inevitable stresses, but you're making a choice to make this day one of your greatest, so the lead-up should be enjoyable. If you're totally overwhelmed by the idea of planning a wedding, or not enjoying the process at all, think about whether hiring a Wedding Planner in Barbados. Don't forget, you can always pull the plug or elope - all you need to get married is a registrar and two witnesses. So don't worry about disappointing a relative or losing a deposit, your wellbeing is so much more important!
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